Hope

Rick Reilly is one of my favorite sports writers and you owe it to yourself to read this piece. Where would any of us be without hope?

Who is My Neighbor?

Snow in Seattle will always be magical to me. I can remember sitting near the back sliding door updating my mom every 2-3 minutes on the status of the snow from the time of the first snowflake. "Still snowing!"

We all know the snow is fun for snowball fights, sledding, and snowman-making. It's a great excuse to skip work for many people and it turns our gray worlds into bright white snowglobes. I love the absolute silence that comes with the snow. Any time I go for a walk, I make it a point to stop so I no longer hear the "swish" of my pants of the crunch of the snow beneath my boots. It is very rare that we have utter silence in our lives these days. As I write, I hear the whir of the VCR, the ticking of a clock, and the engines of the cars going by; but Sunday morning as I walked to work, I stopped and heard absolutely nothing for several minutes. It was a glorious awe-filled silence that spoke louder to me than anything audible possibly could.

I know the hazards of snow, too. One check of the facebook status updates of my virtual friends tells me there are many who are stir-crazy, some stuck at airports, and others simply ready to get on with their normal lives. I understand those plights and have certainly found myself frustrated at times as well. Of course, there are others facing even more dire circumstances, for whom the sky is their roof and the snow is a cold, unwelcome visitor to their home. As the snow fell last week, I couldn't help but think of those living in Nickelsville particularly, which tempered my excitement.

But today's events won me over for snow and reminded me of its magic. My day was bookended by good Samaritans. This morning, as I struggled for the second time to get the chains on my tires, cars whizzed by for 20 minutes. I thought about how great a second pair of hands would be for the task as a suburban slowed down, stopped 20 yards down the road, and backed up. The driver rolled down the window to ask if I needed help. I can't remember if I said anything or if the frustrated look on my face gave me away, but he immediately pulled over in front of my car, hopped out with his friend and they helped me get the chains on the tires of the Vibe. (Ok, by "they helped," I mean "they did everything.") It took 10 minutes or so and I got to know a couple of mortgage bankers who would be great to call if I ever actually make enough money to buy a house. No, they did not stop to make a customer. Yes, I did get a business card. Yes, they will get a Christmas card in the mail from me.

Tonight, I got home and discovered the plows had left piles of snow (that was now ice) between the road and the parking alongside the road. To my dear vibe, piles of icy snow are insurmountable mountains. So, I somehow wedged my way over near the curb and went to get a shovel with which to clear a better spot and conquer that mountain so that my life will be easier in the morning. As I finish my task, a man approaches and asks if I'm trying to get my car out. I immediately think he wants my parking spot or doesn't want me parking in front of my house or needs to fit his car in front of mine. Then I see the shovel he's holding and he says, "I was just talking on the phone and I looked out the window and saw you shoveling and thought I'd come help." I talked to Paul, my neighbor for several minutes, discovered his wife works at Safeway, he's lived in Seattle his whole life, and his house was built in the 1930s by the same people who built the house I'm renting.

I repeat: I TALKED TO MY NEIGHBOR. In this age of not acknowledging anyone, I'm struck by how a little snow can create a human connection between us and prompt us to reach out to each other. College students were using brooms to get snow off the tents in Nickelsville last Thursday. People at the bus stop acknowledged each other and had full conversations. I talked to my neighbor.

We were made to connect with people. We can see God in people we've never met before and we are called to serve all those in need. I think we suppress that need for connection, but it's so innate that it only takes a little snow to bring it to the surface. I heart snow always and forever. (Unabridged version)

Who's Right?

"Nobody's perfect"
or
"Practice makes perfect"

...because I'm not sure there's room for both sayings in one language.

I'm Back... Now Where Did I Leave that Soapbox?

I’m back from my month-long inpatient rehab and though the detox was painful, I have learned there is still reason to live and ways to spend my time other than refreshing bbc.com. For instance, I can take up my soapbox issue: The misuse of “literally.” I know, I know, there are better causes to stand for, but this simply needs to be brought into the light and it distracts me from the world of politics. I heard three absolutely egregious abuses of the defenseless word that must be called out:

“It literally reeks of desperation.” – The writer (a professional writer) did not go on to describe any kind of actual odor. He just compared the concept of a Grammys Nomination Concert to something about Fantasy Football. Do they bottle “Desperation?” I bet it actually smells mysteriously seductive.

Commercial: “If you don’t buy your windows from (insert company name here), you’re literally throwing your money out the window.” – No I’m not, you just happen to use an English idiom to create a clever pun. Perhaps I am figuratively throwing said money, but no cash or coins will actual be expelled from my window.

Sports commentator: “They are literally shooting themselves in the foot right now.” I don’t remember which team was Coug’ing it at the time, but I do know Plaxico Burress was not involved.

The sad thing is, I think our VP-elect is one of the worst abusers of this word… And then there's this. D’oh!

… I might need to check back into Politicaholics Anonymous rehab.

Do They Have a 12-Step Group for This???

Hi, my name is Becky and I'm addicted to political and election news. It's official. I have an addiction. To something more than coffee, that is.

I should have seen the warning signs:

• Watching Rachel Maddow on TiVo before sunrise.
• Getting home from the INN feeling too tired to brush my teeth, but good enough to see what Jon Stewart had to say.
• ...And Colbert too.
• My newfound ability to name a dozen different polling agencies.
  
• Confusing Sarah Palin and Tina Fey.
• Waking up to realize Sean Hannity and Keith Olbermann were in my dream.
• Considering Anderson Cooper and Campbell Brown two of my closest friends.

Now that there is a proverbial light at the end of this pundit- and pander-filled tunnel, I'm starting to wonder what I'm going to do with my time. Most people will say they can't wait for this season to be finished so they won't have to watch the ads anymore. I can't help but wonder if they are secretly suffering from the same disease as I am. It's not the ads. It's my inability to turn away from the ads. I should not feel as though I'm on a first-name basis with most of the people pictured.

Don't get me wrong, I pay attention to politics all the time and I also realize nothing really changes on November 5. It's not like I'm being forced to quit cold turkey. This seems analogous to those who are finishing a great novel in one of those (seemingly) never-ending series. Harry Potter comes to mind. I can't wait to see how the story ends, but I will miss it once it's over. In fact, I already went back and re-read the whole metaphorical book before I finished the last chapter. That's right, this weekend - the weekend before the election - I watched a retrospective of the 2008 presidential campaigns. It was a sentimental journey through debates, 3am phone calls, lipstick on a pig, and a few Joes (Biden, Six-pack, and The Plumber). Those were the days.

The first step is admitting you have a problem, right? It's time for me to look up steps 2 through 12. Let's just hope the headaches aren't as bad as when I try to give up coffee.

Favorite Photo Friday

Taken August05 with Canon EOS Digital Rebel in Spokane, WA

I'm pretty sure this was Cameron's 2nd birthday. Which means that this picture was taken back when he was my only nephew. River was born a month later. I'm not the biggest fan of the composition of this picture, particularly the shadows of the trees. I do love everything this picture symbolizes to me, though; when I look at this photo, I conceptualize guidance and safety. My brother is such a great dad. From the moment I took the picture, it reminded me of another picture:

(I didn't take this one...)

Beware the End of the Age

Just overheard on The Daily Show:
"All hell broke loose, quite literally."
I wanted to give you a heads up because I don't think these kinds of things can be contained locally, so it could get ugly everywhere.

Favorite Photo Friday

Taken 19Sept08 with Canon EOS Digital Rebel near Mt. Baker, WA

This is really the first picture I've posted that I took because of my concentrated effort to take more pictures. We were at the Firs Chalet near Bellingham for our student leadership retreat and I decided to go for a walk one morning. The lake right outside was as smooth as glass. I played around a lot with the manual setting and loved capturing the moment. I'm sure a few of the other pictures from that morning will make appearances on FPF. The pictures themselves are fine, but I love the moment they catch - the quiet of sunrise in the setting I love the most: mountains.

Don't ask why the text is so small. I've tried to change it several times and it looks right in the WYSIWYG. I blame blogspot.

The Great Depression

Ok, it's time for me to weigh in on the issue that seems to be on the mind of everyone I talk to these days. It makes sense that this topic has become so ubiquitous - who could ignore such an historic crash? It makes sense that I get sucked into the bad news and lose sleep over it regularly. I mean, just a few years ago, things were looking pretty good. Numbers were up and there was a reason to be optimistic about the future. Now, on this side of the crash, it's hard to see how things will ever improve. I find myself worried that things will take a long time to improve, or (shudder): they will get worse.

I'm talking, of course, about the state of my favorite sports teams. As can be seen in this picture of a man forced to watch a Carlos Silva start after learning how much he was paid this season, the sports year in Seattle has been vomit-inducing. The brilliantly insightful and humorous Bill Simmons (AKA, "The Sports Guy") recently called this "the single most depressing season for a city in the history of professional sports." Oh, the agony it is to admit that he's right! Unfortunately, though, he's only scratching the surface. Throw Division 1 NCAA teams in there - at least the ones people will pay money to see - and we're talking devastation of epic proportions for this city.

Let's face the facts: it couldn't possibly get much worse than this.
Over on Mountlake, the Huskies' basketball team underachieved when it failed to play in any postseason tournament at all. The football team's recruiting class was getting rave reviews which made me a believer. Certainly they would contend for a bowl this year, right? My optimism was quickly squashed. Now I don't even get to watch Jake.

My beloved Mariners had the 9th highest payroll in Major League Baseball this year. What did that earn them? The second worst record in the game. To top it off, they mortgaged their future with the Bedard trade last winter, so "there's always next year" never rang so hollowly.

The Seahawks depressed us with a drubbing at the hands of Green Bay in the playoffs last January. Now they look like they may make the meteoric fall from 5 straight division titles to a 1-15 record. Looking at their schedule (and their injury report), I'm predicting a 6-9 finish at best and a windfall for local sports medicine doctors. The one team we've been able to count on lately is letting us down.

I don't even know what to say about the Team Formerly Known as the Seattle Supersonics. This is the team that won the National Championship - the only significant national championship in Seattle (sorry Storm fans) - two months after I was born. Memories of watching Gus Williams, Jack Sikma, Nate McMillan, "Big Smooth" Sam Perkins, and Gary Payton definitely gave me an emotional bond with the green & gold. (We're ignoring their brief flirtation with red right now). Not only did this team suck this year, but they were stolen from us! If I ever meet David Stern or Clay Bennett at a 4-way stop, I am NOT letting them go first. They are bad people.

Poor Seattle. Clearly we have much more important crises to worry about. But sports are supposed to be our diversion and the place we can turn to be cheered while the world going you-know-where in a you-know-what. That might be the case in many parts of the country (curse you, Boston!) where hope abounds, but not in the otherwise glorious city in which I live.

Do you think we could convince the federal government to consider a bailout of professional sports in Seattle?

How depressing.

Favorite Photo Friday

Taken October05 with Canon EOS Digital Rebel in Spokane, WA

This picture combines 3 of my favorite things:
1) Nephews. My very favorite "things" there are.
2) Fall. Again, sorry to belabor the point.
3) Pumpkins. The perks of which I have previously enumerated.

Therefore, how could I not love this picture? A nephew dressed as a pumpkin, two nephews in front of hundreds of pumpkins on a beautiful fall day. It does not get any better than that.

Favorite Fall Foods

Rumor has it that today was a beautiful warm day in Seattle. I'm not really sure because I spent less than a minute of daylight hours outside today. I'm ok with that because I'm done feeling guilty for not being outside more. Another reason I'm glad fall is here. Back on that subject, my list of the best fall foods. Do you have any to add?

*Candy Corn. I was a late adapter to the candy corn phenomenon, only starting to like it a couple years ago. I'm not sure what's not to like, though. There's nothing wrong with pure sugar.

*Pumpkin anything. I'm a huge fan of the pumpkin... Pumpkin cookies, pumpkin bread, pumpkin bagels, and pumpkin doughnuts are among my favorites. Pumpkin ice cream, pumpkin pie (which is near the bottom of my pumpkin list, but still good), pumpkin pancakes... Yum.

*Chai Tea. Nothing says fall like drinking chai somewhere inside when it's not-so-warm outside. I personally prefer Tazo (milk only, no water) to some of the sweeter chais like Oregon, but any chai will do.

*Soup. What a great food category soup is. I love how easy it is to make in a Crock Pot. I love how easy it is to heat up as leftovers. I love what a great conduit it is for eating bread.

*Apples with Caramel. Just good. And so fall.

I don't really eat/drink any of these in the summer and many of them are so seasonal I only have a 2 month window to partake. Yes, indeed, welcome back fall.

Here's that Pumpkin Bread recipe. This makes one loaf. I almost always double it:
Mix: 6 T butter, 2 eggs, 1/3 c. milk, 1 t. vanilla
In a separate bowl, combine: 1-1/2 c. flour, 1-1/3 c. sugar, 1 t. baking soda, 1/4 t. baking powder, 1/2 t. cloves, 1/2 t. ginger, 1 t. cinnamon (I add slightly less ginger & cloves and slightly more cinnamon...)

Add 1/2 the flour mix to the rest and mix. Add 1 c. canned pumpkin and mix again. Add the remaining flour mixture (don't forget this part) and mix. Add 1/2 c. walnuts (if you want to ruin the bread with walnuts) and mix.

Bake at about 350 for about 50 minutes. (This recipe is written in the back of a book because someone recited it to me in Core Group 7 years ago. I have to get the book out every year to make this bread because I've never bothered to transfer the recipe... And I don't have the temp or time written, so I make it up. It works much better when you turn the oven on.)

The Cluster that Just Was

I know, right? I don't post for three weeks and now I post twice in one evening. But, I have 44 minutes to spare, I need to stay awake, and I already had date night with TiVo this weekend. So, it's either this or read and I did that all afternoon. I can only bleach the sink one time before I get labeled OCD. Besides, what just happened needs to be chronicled for posterity.

Tomorrow morning I'm hosting the UMin staff meeting at my house. That entails basically having coffee and a few snacks for the 14 folks I work with. No problem; I love baking. Janie requested pumpkin bread, one of my specialties (and something that should have been listed in the previous post as something I love about fall. Perhaps "Fall Foods" needs its own listing. I digress.)

This evening, I go to make the bread thinking I have everything I need. I even had a can of pumpkin because I knew fall was coming. Around 9, I go to the kitchen to start the project only to find that I don't have milk, so it's off to Safeway for me. I get home, work my magic with my lovely Kitchenaid, get the batter in the 2 loaf pans, and put them in the oven. Then I start cleaning up the mess - something that gives me an odd pleasure. I get the Kitchenaid bowl filled with soapy water, measuring spoons & cups, spatulas, and anything else that needs cleaning and fits inside. While that soaks, I go to wipe the counter. Only to find a bowl with about 1/3 of the remaining flour mixture. D'oh!

I rush to get the loaves out of the oven thinking they hadn't been in there long enough for it to be too late. I found out quickly they had definitely been in there long enough to burn my fingers off (apparently 5 minutes or so is long enough to need a hot pad). YOW! I put my hands under cold water for a few seconds before rescuing the bread from the oven. How badly was I burned? Let's just say I don't have to worry about those crimes I recently committed because my fingerprints on my thumb and first two fingers of both hands has now been altered. I wish I were kidding. I cannot feel the keys as I type.

So, after a little while longer at the sink, I return to the pumpkin bread. All the batter returns to the now-clean mixing bowl and I add the remaining flour, remix, throw it back in the oven, and return to cleaning. I throw the kitchen mat in the washer since I have to wait 50 minutes for the bread anyway. The sink gets scrubbed. My hands periodically return to the cold water. I go ahead and pull out the tea and mugs for the morning. I look at the oven. Two minutes left. Sleep is near. I take a peek. They are just as I had put them in. Once again: D'OH! I.am.brilliant. Apparently in my anger at the oven for heating so quickly and burning off the pads of my fingers, I had turned it off. "That-will-show-it." Except I forgot to turn it back on. Yes, brilliant. So, this project I went into the kitchen to start at 9 that was supposed to still get me in bed by 10:30 continues even now. I tell you what, whatever comes out of that oven 21 minutes better be damn good. Now how should I spend that time?

This blog needs some fall colors.

Welcome Back

September is what you might call a busy month for me - hence the three week hiatus from blogdom. September is also the month that ushers in my favorite season. I absolutely love the fall. Let me count the ways:

*Football starts. I love the sport even though the Dawgs and Hawks have both struggled to different degrees. I also, though, love the rhythm that football brings. Baseball has a beautiful steady consistency throughout the summer. Football paces itself, bringing pace to my own life.
*The weather. Oh, how I have loved breaking out jackets, sweaters, and jeans again this month. One can only wear flip-flops for so many consecutive days. I'm ready to pack the shorts for a while. Seattle in the fall is the best. We even get respites from the gray on days like today (70s!?!). But there is something comforting about the gray, too. Of course, the shorter days also bring the beautiful leaves. Oh, the leaves.
*New beginnings. There is no reason for us to pretend the year starts mid-winter. We all know that in the rhythm of most lives, the new year starts in the fall. With school starting around the country, the idea that it's a whole new start - a second, third, or 29th chance - is in the air. My resolutions come in September, not in January.

It might get into the 80s tomorrow. I will enjoy it because I know there aren't many more of those Seattle can eke out this year. But when the gray comes back, I will be waiting and I will be excited.

It's kind of odd that in nature, spring brings new life and fall in actuality is the beginning of the slow death of so many things. Because in the life of us humans it seems there is something very life-giving about the fall. The cool air refreshes, the new beginnings invigorate. I absolutely love this season. Welcome back, fall.

Literally Speaking...

I think it's about time for me to weigh in on the Summer Olympics. I miss those darn Olympics. Because they are over, I am reduced to watching the end of a 7-2 Mariner game (or, I suppose) doing something productive.

My favorite Olympic sports to watch this year were volleyball, gymnastics, and of course swimming. My favorite Olympic sport to play this year was "Listen to the announcers misuse the word 'literally.'" I think I would have received at least the silver in that event. I have to warn you, fair reader, that this is a pet peeve of mine. "Literally" has become so overused and misused, that we're going to lose it entirely soon. We must not let it happen!

These were the heinous offenses overheard during the Olympics (even the Canadians screwed it up once; no one is immune!):

- "He is literally that good." (Referring to a baseball player who is so good, he could hit a double.) No. He just plain is that good. He's "very" good or he's "really" good, but what point were you trying to make, Mr. Announcer? "He's not just figuratively that good, people. He's literally that good." What? While we're at it, find another adjective. "Good" is boring. You're paid to describe things with words for a living.
Ahem, sorry for the tirade. It gets worse, though.

- After the Americans won a baseball game: "They literally swept the table with them."
What table? Perhaps they swept said team, in the figurative sense that we have come to use that word meaning they beat them every time they played, but they certainly did not actually break out brooms to do it. If I'm wrong and they did, why didn't they televise that?!?

- While watching diving: "She literally fell apart during the semi-finals."
Ewwwwwwww. I'm glad I didn't have to clean that up. I hope they had doctors on hand to put her back together.

Seriously, people, we can do this. Together we can unite for a better English language. (But don't look to our politicians to bring this change; the presidential candidates have been some of the most egregious offenders I've heard.) "Literally" is an important word and we need to save it. I implore you:

-Let's not use "literally" to help us exaggerate: "He is literally 10 feet tall!" No... No, he's not.
-Let's not use "literally" when there is no figurative option: "He is literally 6 feet tall" is unnecessary unless we are prone to lying and even then we should really say, "He is exactly 6 feet tall," or something to that effect.
-And for goodness' sake, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE let us not use "literally" when we mean the exact opposite: "He was so mad, he literally exploded at me." I certainly hope not.

I'm no English teacher nor am I a grammar scholar. I'm simply one woman who wants the word "literally" back for the world's children.

Favorite Photo Friday

Another week, another blogless 7 days. Alas, I have 3 hours to post a photo at least.Taken 30June08 with Canon EOS Digital Rebel in Rhodes, Greece

Not much to say - I just like this picture. I love playing with focus on foreground and background. In this case, I love the metaphor that this is to my life verse: "I have set the Lord always before me; because he is at my right hand, I will not be shaken." Setting the Lord always before us means we will see everything we do through Him...

Favorite Photo Friday

After a week at staff retreat, it's already time for Favorite Photo Friday again. Which just reminds me that I took 0 (zero) pictures this week.

Taken 30Sept07 with Canon SD400 in Seattle, WA (Safeco Field)

I melt when I look at this picture because it combines some of my favorite things: Seattle, baseball, Safeco Field, and River. I love that Riv laughs at me a lot. River is one of my "nephews." In other words, we are not related by blood, but we are related by heart. His mom and dad really are my sister and brother. I see him and his younger brother Truss about once a week and I get to see them tonight. I'm so excited. A few weeks ago, we had a "mom's dinner" - when Jamie and I have dinner with both of our moms. At some point, Jamie's mom asked River if he liked it when Becky came to visit. He said, "Yeah, it makes me feel good inside." If that doesn't melt my heart, nothing will. I would do anything for any of my nephews.

Oh, and... The Mariners won this, the last game of the season 4-2. Felix pitched a brilliant game giving up 4 hits in 8.2 innings. AND, the game was over in less than two hours which means Jamie was happy and I had hope for next season (which was violently squashed this past April).

River will be three years old in one month. If you say anything in his presence about baseball or the Mariners, he will loudly declare, "Ken Griffey Jr. is the best Mariner ever!" just because he knows it will elicit a high five and loads of verbal commendation from me. I have taught him well.

Favorite Photo Friday

Since I would like to both write and take pictures more, this blog can truly be my creative outlet, right? Hence, I'm installing Favorite Photo Friday in hopes that it motivates me to take more pictures. For now, I'll have to rely on my backstock in iphoto. All pictures will be those that I have taken and happen to like for whatever reason - subject, composition, memories...
Behold, a sunrise in the Dominican Republic:


Taken 28March2008 with Canon SD400 in Barahona, D.R.

There's actually a picture I like better than this one of the DR Sunrise at Ponte Vedra Hotel, but it was taken several years ago so it's not on this computer; this one will have to work. I love the sunrise - just like I love the fall - because it's got so much potential and such a feeling of newness. This picture doesn't even do the DR sunrises justice, but it will do for now.

In Search of Reflection without Narcissism

"The unexamined life is not worth living."
- Socrates, right?

Something that has been on my mind a lot lately - how much (meaning how often, not how highly) are we really to think about ourselves? I mean, I know what Socrates meant; if we are simply drones moving through life without thinking and reflecting, there is no point. Yet, what if examining our lives becomes the point? That seems infinitely worse. I'm certain that a life constantly reflected upon becomes terrifyingly paralyzing.

Why these thoughts lately?
#1 - Foster. Of course, his Prayer book is what first got me contemplating this delicate balance. The first section of his book is dedicated to the "movement inward." And the other day I read his chapter on the Prayer of Examen. I finished the chapter acutely aware of the tension we live in to examen our lives and yet not be narcissistic.
#2 - An entry in a friend's blog. The prayer, "God, distract me from myself" is a profound one that resonates with us all. It's so important not to simply swim in our own thoughts. Sometimes I think that the e-mail, facebook, and yes, even blogs of this society are the biggest culprits that cause us to think about ourselves more than we need to - perhaps more than is healthy.
#3 - The topic at the INN was submission. Submitting to one another - getting underneath each other to lift each other up - is the key to strong relationships. My thought on the way home: "As long as we're thinking about ourselves, we can't submit."
#4 - As I've said and insinuated above, my biggest fear with this blog is that it will cause me to put myself at the center of my life. Recently, I would say I've erred in the other direction - not taking time to reflect. That was a motivating factor to start writing. I certainly want to be cautious of the dangers of too much self-reflection.

I've heard Ryan suggest many times to people who find themselves feeling down to "do something nice for someone else." It's not so profound, really. Basically, "Stop thinking about yourself" or, in the words of the prayer above, allow God to "distract you from yourself."

Where is the balance? I think Foster's words are wise in this. When we move inward, when we search our inner thoughts, we must invite the Lord on the journey. God dwells in us, so self-reflection can lead us to the truth and genuine self-knowledge of who we are and our place in serving our community. It's no coincidence that Jesus put these two side-by-side right after encouraging us to love God: "Love your neighbor as yourself." Don't ignore yourself and try to love your neighbor, but don't turn completely inward, endlessly dissecting your own thoughts.

If only it were as easy to do as it is to say.

Confessions of a Non-Runner Runner

I have always hated running unless I was either (a) chasing a ball or (b) being chased. The only motivation I had for running in high school were the coaches who would just make me do more of the loathed activity if I didn't complete the first round. So I ran to avoid running.

Sure, I tried to "go for a run" every once in a while with Jamie (who is what you might call a "runner"), but it never caught on. Some people talk about how great it is to pray while they run or how it clears their mind or allows them to think about their day, prepare a talk, or engage other productive thoughts. My mind on the other hand always thought about the same thing: "You're tired. Why are you doing this? You know, you're running for no reason. There is no one chasing you and you're not late for anything. Why don't you just walk, Self?" At which time I would give into these thoughts and walk back home for some ice cream to congratulate myself for getting out of the house.

So, this morning as I ran a short run, I thought about how odd it is that I have picked up running over the past year as a hobby. Ok, let's be honest; What I've picked up is jogging. But, I did participate in a marathon relay (pictured - and well worth it because I ran 5 miles and got a t-shirt & a medal that said I completed a marathon.) AND, I managed to complete a half marathon. Don't get me wrong, I still hate the part about working when I don't have to, but I've learned to do it anyway.

Here's how:
1) I'm lazy. That's right, I run because I'm lazy. Running is the fastest, easiest way to stay in shape, so I don't have to buy any equipment except shoes and I don't have to think of other, more creative ways to remain relatively healthy.

2) NPR. I'm pretty sure most people assume that I'm listening to "pump-you-up music" like Michael Phelps through my telltale white ear phones. Well, I hate to disappoint, but 75% of the time, it's an NPR podcast. (And of the remaining 25%, probably 1/2 of the time I'm listening to a sermon. So, Kanye and friends only make it through less than 15% of the time). "Wait, Wait Don't Tell Me" is a great way to get the news of the week AND get a good laugh. Plus, there's the added benefit of the weird look from strangers as you laugh out loud while you run past them. Just a few Paula Poundstone and Peter Sagal mockeries of our president later, and you've almost run a mile without thinking about how hard it is to breathe. Another good one for word nerds like me is the "Sunday Puzzle." Not only do you get to listen to the soothing voice of Will Shortz, but while your mind tries to figure out how you can rearrange the letters in "egomaniac" to "spell a familiar sign seen in many stores," you're logging miles and not the least bit worried about the fact that your legs feel like jell-o when you're at least 20 minutes from home.

3) Trash Talk. Anyone and Everyone. This morning, it worked to trash talk myself: "One mile down - and in just over 10 minutes. That's not terrible. Wait a second, Self. Isn't a mile pretty close to the 1500m you watched Lagat run in about 3 and a half minutes yesterday? That's right, it only took you three times as long. Now stop thinking about how you want to walk!" Perhaps it's the voice of my high school coaches in my head, but it does no good to argue that comparing a part-time jogger to an Olympic-trained athlete makes no sense. Hey, if it motivates me, I'm not going to worry about logic. You can also trash talk the neighbors: "I wonder if they meant for their front lawn to look like a staging ground for landfill?" (I told you my thoughts weren't productive. They're not always uplifting either.)

4) Sprint the last part. Not only will all of your neighbors think you ran that fast the whole time and be impressed, you will convince yourself you ran that fast the whole time, too. Plus, it adds to the out-of-breath factor, which tricks your brain into thinking you're a runner instead of a jogger.

5) Goals. The bottom line is, I would not get out of bed if I didn't have a race or something that I "had" to prepare for. "If you don't run the 3 miles today, you won't be able to run the 5 miles this weekend and then that $70 you paid to run with 5,000 other people will REALLY be wasted." Plus, if you enter a race, they give you a really comfy shirt for "free."

So, I hope that helps someone out there who hates running. If you are one of those people who LOVES to run and can't get enough of it and is going to tell me that if I just run far enough or long enough, I will experience one of those "runner's highs," I don't want to hear about it. Thanks for playing, but if you keep talking about that, I'm not sure we can be friends anymore.

Cake Wrecks - Try Not to Stare

Whelp, it's already a good day. Pretty sure I found my new favorite website.

Neutrality

I would like to offer one more counsel to those who find themselves devoid of the presence of God. It is this: wait on God. Wait, silent and still. Wait, attentive and responsive. Learn that trust precedes faith. Faith is a little like putting your car into gear, and right now you cannot exercise faith, you cannot move forward. Do not berate yourself for this. But when you are unable to put your spiritual life into drive, do not put it into reverse; put it into neutral. Trust is how you put your spiritual life in neutral. Trust is confidence in the character of God. Firmly and deliberately you say, "I do not understand what God is doing or even where God is, but I know that he is out to do me good." This is trust. This is how to wait.
-Richard Foster, Prayer (24)

I love that Foster acknowledges the need at times to put our spiritual lives in neutral. I know I've found myself in that place - where I can't put my foot on the gas pedal to move forward. Perhaps I'm even tempted to put it in park, shut 'er down and start walking. I love this metaphor, though, and the recognition that neutral is not a bad place to be. I have certainly at times found myself idling in my faith but not for a lack of effort. Yet another of Foster's allures - his willingness to admit that it's not always easy.

Have you ever awakened to a day that you have absolutely no plans and you don't really realize it until that morning? What a gift. That's where I find myself today. A blank slate of a day. It is definitely a gift I look forward to opening; it's a chance to take a deep breath and get some oxygen as we prepare to start the marathon that is the school year. Sometimes neutral is a good place to be - not only in our spiritual lives, but in our constant striving toward productivity.

World Wide Waste-of-time

In case you'd lost hope in the internet's ability to time suck: Have no fear. Please don't click if you have things you actually need to accomplish today.

Rock Throwing

I just got back from the Summer INN and as I indulged in my post-Summer-INN-ritual-bowl-of-cereal, I noticed TiVo's red light was on. "But the Daily Show doesn't start for half an hour..." Aw, how sweet! TiVo had a surprise for me. Driving home, I had thought I would turn on NBC to see Phelps win the medals I already knew he had won even though I would see the highlights a bajillion times. But TiVo had other ideas and it turned out to be Demetri Martin: Person. I turned it on and Demetri was in the middle of his "Large Pad" segment. If you haven't seen it, you owe it to yourself to check it out. Make sure you at least get to the part about rock throwing. If you make it through that and have time for more (in other words, you don't need to go change because you peed your pants), you can listen to him sing. He is what you might call a brilliant comedian. Or at least you should call him such.

I wish I got home this early on Tuesdays during the school year. Luckily, I don't even need to be here for TiVo to know what I like. Who needs a boyfriend when you have a roommate like TiVo?

Speaking of which (or not), I started re-reading Richard Foster's book on prayer today. He literally wrote the book on prayer. And he called it Prayer. I appreciate his simplicity. It's true, I love Foster and this book particularly. (I guess that's obvious since this is a re-read.) Foster has a way of making the lofty and spiritual down-to-earth and obtainable. The concept that most stood out as I read his first offering on "Simple Prayer" was this:
"The only place that God can bless us is right where we are, because that is the only place that we are." This is something I have heard expressed a variety of ways, but really stood out to me this morning. Not only is it important for us not to be waiting for the weekend, for our next job, for "this busy week" to be over, to get married, to have kids, to earn enough, to (insert what will lead to happiness here), but it is actually IMPOSSIBLE to be blessed in any moment outside of this one. For whatever reason, that struck me this morning and reminded me to be "present where I'm present," which is an oft-said Gaffism.

I'm off to be present with my pillow and Patito (the giant stuffed duck who shares my bed). But, if you're looking for more laughs, see if you can't hunt down the Daily Show clip that just aired of correspondent Rob Riggle reporting from China about the food. HILARIOUS.

Moving Day

I moved. Already. Sorry. Remind me to tell you a story about moving sometime.
The New Site

The Nephews are Here! The Nephews are Here!

This is why I'm so excited:



I think it's a zoo day. Hurrah!

Ivan Frakkin' Lendl!

I've found a good purpose for the blog. Ranting about lost trivia nights. Trivia nights are great fun. But they can also be quite anguishing when you ... Oh, I don't know, finish in 3rd place and have about 4 or 5 answers you were [[[this close]]] to getting right. U2's album that went to number one the day after it was released? Joshua Tree (we over-thought that one). The team OJ Simpson played his last game for? San Francisco 49ers. The two words Jim Henson morphed to create the word "muppets"? "Puppet" and "Marionette," of course! (Not "music," after all.) Rickey Henderson played his last game for the Dodgers. Morgan Freeman's name on Driving Miss Daisy was Hoke. The one that really got me, though was, "Who finished 1985, '86, '87, '89 as the number 1 tennis player in the world?" Not that I follow professional tennis and not that I know who finished number 1 any given season, but the fact that I could list every tennis player in the '80s I could think of and not come up with Ivan Lendl... IVAN LENDL! ...just makes me weep for my trivia skills. And sports is the one category I'm supposed to bring something to the table. Fix two of these wrong answers and we're in the money. Instead, we pay the bill for our burgers and go home to try to sleep (and apparently write anguished blog posts).

Blogger's Remorse

I remembered mid-day Saturday that I had started a blog. I wondered how something like that could happen when I was fully conscious of my behavior at the time. What had come over me? I started to feel buyer's remorse instantly and then I remembered that it's all free. I tried to psychoanalyze why I was experiencing said remorse and I realized that I felt pressure. Pressure to be a good writer and pressure to be funny, for sure - but I don't really care that much about what people think of me, do I? The answer is no. I realized the biggest pressure I felt was to write in this durn thing at all. "I already have so many things going on - what was I thinking? I don't have time for a blog..." Which is when I also remembered I don't have to write in this thing at all. Nobody is paying attention anyway. Besides, if they (I guess that would be YOU) do start paying attention and I stop writing in it, I just bought you time that you would have wasted reading my random thoughts about pointless things.

Speaking of which, it feels arrogant to me to think that anybody would take time to read this. That's dangerous to admit because I have so many blogging friends. Don't take that the wrong way - I don't think you're arrogant. Just me. But, I guess you're under no obligation to read this, even if you are my friend (yes, there are a few people out there that would label themselves such). Soooooo... I guess I'll just assume no one ever reads this and call it good. If you choose to spend your time reading about my life and my thoughts, so be it.

This adventure into blogdom partially came about because several people told me, "You should have a blog. I would read it." I have their names written down and I'm going to quiz them on my blog topics. Question #1: What's the name of my blog and why? Answer to part B: The two best 3-word comebacks of all time. You're in an argument and the other person won't stop making sense. You know you've lost. Either line gets you out 100% free from admitting defeat. What are you supposed to say in response to either line? Trust me - try it.

Wait, WHO'S Just Saying?

I can’t believe I’m even contemplating entrance into the world of Blog. I remember when I first heard about this new aspect of the "World Wide Waste-of-time" on CNN of all places. It’s just like CNN to keep me hip with the kids. My first thought at the time was, “Who wants to read the thoughts of random people? Tell me these aren’t random people writing these things…” Well, the past few years, I have found myself reading several blogs with varying regularity and I have discovered that these people aren’t quite as random as I thought. The blogs I read are all people I knew before finding their blogs and now feel like I know so much better.

Truth be told, I may or may not actually know these people better – part of me wonders if once you start writing a blog you don’t take on a veritable ‘blog persona’ … Regardless, my new realization is that blogs can be fun. And I have been wanting to write more. What better excuse than to start a blog? Perhaps I will end up wasting my time doing so. Maybe no one will read it (part of me actually hopes that is true). Regardless, is it any worse than the ways I waste time now – hanging out with my friends So You Think You Can Dance, Project Runway, Cash Cab, the Colbert Report, or whoever else my best friend TiVo happens to bring to the party each night? I give a lot of advice to people that includes the phrase “What can it hurt to try it?” and tonight I’m going to take my own advice. Besides, I've had a handful of people tell me they would read my blog if I ever started one (if you are one of those people, I won't hold you to it beyond this first post). Who knows? Maybe I’ll come up with some brilliant thoughts that will change the world. Or perhaps (more likely) a decent thought that will change one person's day. Can’t hurt, right? I’m just saying…